Tuesday, April 25, 2006/8:38 pm
the expected and the unexpected..
hello my darlings..
its been awhile since i've updated this blog.. well, instead of feeling guilty about it, i'm rather proud of myself for keeping myself preoccupied with so many things that it made me resist the temptation of using the laptop every single day.. well, isnt that utter bullshit.. hahax.. truthfully speaking, my laptop crashed awhile back and my cousin didnt had any time to come around to fix it.. i am utterly grateful that he finally did though..
so, many things had happened since i've last updated.. examinations had shown its fugly head again, with the higher mother tongue papers held last week and english paper 1 today.. well, i think i messed up alot for these papers.. however, am going to ignore the nagging feeling.. will instead resort to being delusionally ignorant.. so, got new venetian blinds so my window.. looked so romantic, i cant help falling head over heels with them.. managed to rent more new books from marine parade and read them all within the first two weeks, scored 10/13 for some social studies assignment, and got some studying done in preparation for the mye papers i'll be taking next week.
guess what i did today? after the paper, i took the emaths test on graphs, dont worry, i did not cheat and then went back home alone and watched 'in her shoes' vcd, which uday had kindly allowed me to borrow. bless her. after praying zohor, went to meet sham at marine parade. thought it was the shopping centre before reaslising my mistake, no actually after calling sham and alerted the whole shopping mall level with my swearing, and meeting sham outside the starbucks of marine parade library. got very little things done though.. not much of a pity since me and sham decided we could not concentrate anymore and started gossiping, and well, you know where that ends. by the way, im absolutely certain the toilet outside is haunted. i was scared shitless being in there alone.
well, what i learn these past month may not be relevant to many but i guess, it meant the world to me. i love my juniors, they rock my world and i miss them so much. with the canoeing season over, i rarely see them anymore. hahax.. but thats okay, bitter sweet memories of mine will always be remembered. thanks to first and foremost sham, follow by vans, ying ying, raihanah, veronica, shan ying (my two beauti-ful bods toilet cubicle buddies!!), chan song, wei jie, christopher, reza, AMIR, barbs, john, nicole, venice and all my other canoeing peeps for making my last year as a Temasek Canoeist an unforgettable one. i dont mind about not winning anything, the experience alone is enough. Thank you. because of you guys, we won back our 'B' div and defended of 'C' dis girls titles and managed to get 4th for 'C' div boys. we knock the shit out of NJC!! now that is an achievement :)
some things just never change. some people just never change. and some, just surprises us in such a good way that it made one feel good about oneself. the merest gesture sometimes are the most memorable. hmm.. or maybe its just me reading too much into things, like i always do but maybe this time, theres actual hope.
`i hope that you would just forget about me, like how im trying to forget you. i know how you feel, im just sad that the feeling's not for me. although i feel that you do not deserve her, my thoughts never really matter much to you anymore. however so, in my new position, i shall not say anymore, but watch from a distance. its time that you should know that im just a memory to you, like i hope you would be to me. goodbye..
im not feeling depressed, but i guess im just sad, even though i should not be. however so, im glad too. maybe i should seize the opportunity to forget about the past and instead think more about the future and the hope it brings. finally get a grip on life. emancipation? far from it. just taking the first step though. i'll get there one day. one fine day.
so, even though exams just around the corner, well, technically speaking, the assignments and tests keep piling up.. who the freaking hell can get any studying done.. well, ouhk, besides han liang and those born-to-be-clever people.. but NOT ME!! I've had it up till here *points to the top of my head* with stuff to do.. seriously.. alright fine, so my time management sucks.. and yea, fine, i even had time to blog.. but this blog entry is a summary of a whole month andtwoo day and is long overdue, so eventually i HAVE TO update it anyway.. even though i said i was on hiatus.. well, i would be lying if i deny the claim that my life revolves around contradictions.. then again, isnt life by itself complicated? or do we complicate our own lives instead? then how come there's a lot of contradictions in life? the same with love, which is a fallacy by the way, or sex, lies or deceit? misconception? or mere misunderstanding? think about it, or better yet, dont.. why ask for a headache..i HATE the book i borrowed from zizie, which thanks to dewi, allowed me to read it first.. i though usually malay books have happy endings, or maybe justice is served, ya noe, the whole good guy wins in the end kinda endings.. nw i just beg to differ.. and the language.. i thought the purpose of reading a book is to IMPROVE my laguage, or at least widen my views on social matters but nooooo....... after reading this book, i BEG to differ, thank you very much.. its like that peribahasa (malay anological proverb) seperti melekut di tepi gantang, masuk tidak memenuhi, keluar tidak mengurangi..well, anyway, people whom are reading this particular entry would be bored by now huh? well, too bad!! but i'd stop now, considering that i've nothing else to say and im suppose to hav a lot of work to do in addition to the two tests im suppose to study for.. ooo! i used a connector.. mr tan, my english teacher, would be so proud of me.. too bad i suck at english any old damn way.. shit.. well, i'm going, im going.. GONE..ouh btw, my top 5 favourite songs this week:- Myself - Kara's Flowers
- N Dey Say - Nelly
- Not Falling Apart - Maroon 5
- Nature Boy - Celine Dion
- Move Along - All American Rejects
im so over franz ferdinand.. the music rocks, dont get me wrong.. they're like system of a down, only different GENRE.. electic and strange, but nice.. but omg.. the singing sucks!! gawd..
basically, a narcissis.